Healing the Whole ...

What a day today has been! It started with my last relationship contacting me via text message. He has been trying to get back in touch and I have been ignoring him. I thought it was the right thing to do as he was angry and saying cruel things I knew he didn't mean. Today his anger reached boiling point. He would use the texts and photos I sent him during our relationship to 'ruin me'. Now he's being dramatic because nothing I have sent him has the power to do that. Shock people maybe. Ruin me - no. But I saw how bad his anger was. This man is not vindictive. Clearly I needed to manage this break-up better. Then I saw my ex-husband. We are in the middle of our divorce. Finalising the finances is hard. He believes we have it all settled. He expects me to follow the plan in his head. I don't want to. My priority is financial sustainability for my daughter and I for the future. It is not to keep him happy. Yet he needs to be managed too else this will spiral out o...

I always talk about the magpie. To me it's a sign of the person I want to be and the relationship I want. The magpie is both black and white. A beautiful juxtaposition of two worlds. Two polar opposites. Male and female. Heart and mind. And when you get two magpies together, two people who are able to inhabit both those opposite worlds, they mate for life. I want to find a magpie. Yet all I seem to meet are blackbirds! I try to be a magpie but inevitably sometimes I will be too black or too white and misjudge the situation and my response. Other people also find my duality difficult to deal with. I don't give the responses expected. I don't occupy the world they have me placed in. I spoke about my male friend recently who asked me for support with his ex-wife. He didn't like the response I gave him which was to love his ex-wife and put her needs first. To empathise with her pain. He accused me of not seeing his pain. But I felt I did. I wanted to help him because ...